Dark Lordess

(Sorry Jules. I took you out of it now. I misunderstood. :oops: ) It wasn't hard for Seyla to find the Dashuben camp. It was only several miles from the ...

This is a very good start to your story! I especially like your paragraphs about his world and the battle. :D Stuff happened -My sword went through a neck... However, ...

The hawk swooped down in front of Seyla. It cocked its head to the side and watched her, its beady eyes glittering. So Galina's still here , thought Seyla. Good. ...

This was wonderfully written. There's a lot of suspense and it really got me hooked. :P She whirled around. Green eyes scanned her surroundings, trying to penetrate the pitch black ...

You have a few typos that get a little annoying as you read it. Spell check would catch a lot of these. :wink: Remember to read it through before submitting. ...

Seyla leaned against a tree and closed her eyes, trying to rid her head of that song. She had never before acted that suddenly or foolishly! There was something about ...

Your story shows potential. :D However, in chapter one, your descriptions of the characters seemed a bit boring. You told us a lot about them, but it seemed more like ...

Seyla looked down at the figure huddled at her feet. The woods waited in deathly silence, as if it was holding its breath, watching. "So that's why you've come back. ...

I'm glad you've added more. I was curious as to what happened next. :P The curtains had been drawn back slightly and she could make out the shape of her ...

Seyla slid her fingers along the knife's smooth handle. Years of use had worn away the once elegant designs. Which is probably a good thing , she thought, considering who's ...

Seyla Race - Unknown Little is known about her. She avoids most people. She has black hair and dark eyes that hide a mysterious past. She's proud and sometimes arrogant. ...

Great story! I love your descriptions. A cold laugh that chilling everyone to their souls echoed across the valley, the soldiers and guards all drew their weapons, shivering uncontrollably... I ...